But we think the answer is simply buy yourself a Blu-Ray player, if you don’t already have one….and we’re old school, we prefer hard copies of movies rather than digital copies (don’t they glitch all the time? Or, is it just us)…

We list below ten football movies that you should watch in your Man Cave. Here is our disclaimer, though, these movies are not necessarily the best football movies; otherwise, it would of course include Brian’s Song. These are football movies we consider fun movies to watch in your Man Cave. And it does not include Rudy, just because everybody has seen it, and if you went to Notre Dame or you’re an Irish fan, this is the only football movie you will ever talk about. Still, we do recommend that you attend at least one Notre Dame football game in your lifetime…

…as well as a trip to Lambeau Field…

Don’t you want to slide down Ariens Hill in Titletown, USA?

But we digress. Here are our 10 football movies, in no particular order of ranking, that you should watch in your Man Cave when there is no actual football to watch.

Friday Night Lights

Texas High School football. What more do you want? Based on the terrific book, Friday Night Lights: A Town, A Team, and a Dream, by H.G. Bissenger. The movie focuses on Permian High School as they chase a state championship, and the obstacles they face, including a serious season-ending ACL injury to their star running back. Friday Night Lights is a must watch. There is also a television series that ran from 2006-2011. And “all you gotta do is hold on to the goddam football…

And in case you want to add the Blu-Ray to your Man Cave movie collection…

Any Given Sunday

Where do we begin? First off, you probably quoted the movie title over and over again during your lifetime. “Hey, the winless Browns beat the undefeated Patriots? Really? Well, anything can happen on Any Given Sunday.” Secondly, this movie has an all-star cast. Al Pacino, Cameron Diaz, Dennis Quaid, James Woods, Jamie Foxx, Mathew Modine (you remember him as Loudain Swain in Vision Quest and the Joker in Full Metal Jacket), and LT, among others. Even Wilt Chamberlain (Mr. 20,000) made an appearance. And finally, who can forget the locker room scene with Cameron Diaz. Anyway, anything can happen on Any Given Sunday…

And in case you want to purchase the Blu-ray…

All The Right Moves

Similar to Friday Night Lights, which gives the viewer a sense of High School football in Texas, All the Right Moves provides a taste of playing High School football in a Pennsylvania steel town. And that sense it, it’s pretty damn important, that’s for sure. The main character is “Stef” Djordjevic, played by Tom Cruise, who goal is to get a football scholarship in order to escape the depressed steel town and become an electrical engineer. The antagonist is Coach Nickerson, played by Craig T. Nelson, well, who happens to be the Coach from the Television series, Coach. And in case you need a motivational speech to get through that long, tough day at work…

The Waterboy

Adam Sandler (aka Happy Gilmore) plays Bobby Boucher, a thirty-one year old mentally-challenged man who serves (and takes his job seriously) as the waterboy for the University of Louisiana football team. Upon getting fired from his job, he becomes the waterboy for the South-Central Louisiana State University Mud Dogs, a team that has lost 40 consecutive games. The Mud Dogs are coached by the Fonz (uh, Henry Winkler) who convinces Bobby to stand up for himself, and after Bobby knocks out the team’s quarterback, he becomes the team’s star middle linebacker, and well, you just have to watch it again. Oh, and Kathy Bates plays Bobby’s overprotective mother, a comedic role which is a far cry from her character, Annie Wilkes, in Misery…

There are so many funny moments in Water Boy, we recommend just viewing this compilation of its best moments…

And in case you want to add the Blu-Ray to your Man Cave collection…

The Program

Yeah, we know, it hits on every stereotype relating to college football, including the dumb jock, performance enhancing drugs, and pay for play. But we think this is an enjoyable movie. It’s about a fictional football team, the Eastern State University Timberwolves, and primarily focuses on Coach Sam Winters, played by James Caan (RIP), who is feeling the pressure to win, the Heisman trophy candidate quarterback, and Darnell Jefferson, the freshman running back played by Omar Epps, whose love interest is played by Hale Berry. So, how do you handle yourself when you are named as one of the starting defensive ends…

The Best of Times

In our opinion, this is an underrated football comedy movie. It came out in 1986, the year the New York Giants won the Super Bowl. But we digress. The plot centers on Jack Dundee, played by Robin Williams (RIP), who can’t get over the pass he dropped in High School against their arch-rival, which resulted in a tie game. The quarterback who threw the pass is Reno Hightower, played by Kurt Russell (aka Snake Plissken) who was the star quarterback but is now a struggling van specialist (e.g. paints art on vans). Jack convinces Reno to re-play the game thirteen years later, which, of course, they do. One of our favorite moments of the movie involves a dinner scene with Reno, Jack and their wives in which they forget that Monday Night Football was on, and Jack tries to accomplish both diner and football simultaneously, well, just take a look at what happens…

Varsity Blues

The strip club scene? Need we say anything more. Unfortunately, we are unable to show it here because it may be inappropriate for some users. But do you really need to see it again? It’s probably etched into your memory. Anyway, the movie is about, well of course, it’s about a Texas High School football team where losing is not an option. The main character is the team’s back-up quarterback, played by James Van Der Beek (Dawson’s Creek) who ascends to the starting role after his friend, the starting quarterback played by Paul Walker (RIP), suffers an injury. What seems similar in most football movies, the anti-hero is the football coach, which in this instance, is played by Jon Voight (the father of Angelina Jolie). Here is a taste of being a second string High School quarterback…

And in case you want to add the Blu-Ray to your collection…

The Replacements

This may not be a classic, but it’s another enjoyable movie that should be watched in your Man Cave. It’s loosely-based on the 1987 football season that, as a result of a player strike, NFL teams were comprised predominantly of replacement players, and of which the Washington Commanders (formerly the Washington Football Team and the Washington Redskins) won all three of its replacement games without any regular players. Keanu Reeves plays Shane Falco, the quarterback and Gene Hackman plays Jimmy McGinty, the affable coach of the replacement team. The most interesting fact related to this movie is that Keanu Reeves character was an All-American quarterback at Ohio State who played in the Sugar Bowl. If you remember (and how can you forget), Keanu Reeves character in Point Break was Johnny Utah, a quarterback from Ohio State who played in the Rose Bowl. Hopefully they didn’t play the same years. Just knowledge that will impress your friends. And when your asked to get the ball, well, just get the ball…

And in case you want to add the Blu-Ray to your Man Cave collection…

The Longest Yard

This is the oldest movie on our list. It was released in 1974. What happened in 1974? President Nixon resigned as a result of the Watergate scandal. But back on topic. The Longest Yard, a classic, features Burt Reynolds as Paul Crewes, former NFL player involved in point shaving who becomes imprisoned after leading police on a car chase. Initially disrespected by fellow inmates, Crewes eventually gains their respect and leads a group of inmates in a football game against a semi-pro team consisting mostly of prison guards, and of which is managed by the sadistic warden of the prison, played by Eddie Albert. The name of the inmates’ team is The Mean Machine, which is almost as good as the Saskatchewan Roughriders. A re-make of The Longest Yard was made in 2005, starring Bobby Boucher, we mean Adam Sandler, as Paul Crewes. Oh, and here is why Paul Crewes went to prison…

And in case you want to add the Blu-Ray to your Man Cave collection…

Jerry Maguire

Released in 1996, Jerry Maguire stars Tom Cruise as the title character, Renee Zellweger as his assistant, and Cuba Gooding, Jr. as Rod Tidwell, a wide receiver for the Arizona Cardinals. The premise of the movie is as follows: Jerry Maguire is a sports agent who gets fired for wanting to focus on fewer clients in order to serve them better, and ends up with a single client, Rod Tidwell. And of course, at the end of the day, he “shows him the money.” Everybody knows that quote, even those born after the movie was released. It had other classic quotes, including “You complete me.” But the quote that almost every person uses to this day in one form or another is “You had me at Hello.” For example, a friend asks, “Do you want to go to Vegas to play golf, gamble, watch football…” And your response, “You had me at Vegas.” Oh, and here’s how you dump your fiancée…

We know that there’s are a lot of good entertaining football movies we left off, and should you disagree with our list, which you have every right to do so, we suggest complaining somewhere else. Or just watch whatever football movies you prefer. In your Man Cave. During Corn Hole season.

Football-Related Items for Your Man Cave

Since you now have a starter list of football movies to watch in your Man Cave, you will need to ensure that you have a sufficient number of football-related items in your Man Cave. So, here are 10 football-related items for your Man Cave, which are not ranked in any particular order.

NCAA Bottle Cap Wall Sign

Watercolor Explosion Football Player

WHY BUY THIS? Ah, so colorful. We think this canvas print would make a nice addition to any Man Cave. And it comes in several sizes to fit any available wall space.

Retro Football Game

WHY BUY THIS? This is old school. Buy it, leave it in your Man Cave, and play it with friends while you watch football. We’re pretty certain you can come up with some creative bets involving this classic game. Or get Mattel Classic Football 2, which has passing, kicking, and backward movement…

Picking NFL Winners

WHY BUY THIS? This is mandatory for your Man Cave, along with the Mr. Boston Official Bartending Guide. Hey, at least you’ll understand how to account for injuries, how one should weigh recent results versus past results when handicapping, how big of an influence are short-rest weeks, the bye week, and travel have on the point spread. Whether time-zone has an effect, and how to use teasers, halftime lines, and line moves to improve your NFL betting results.

Football Stadiums Bucket List Tracker

WHY BUY THIS? Here you go. This is your NFL Stadium Bucket List. Go to one stadium each season, and in 32 years, your bucket list will be complete, unless there are expansion teams.  Or you can do a CFL Stadium Bucket List, which will take only 9 years to complete (there are 9 CFL teams), and you’ll get to enjoy a Labatt Blue.  Just watch this classic commercial…

SuperToe

WHY BUY THIS? Going retro again, Super Toe (or Super Jock) would make a nice addition to the Man Cave, even if it just sitting on a shelf. We mean, just for posterity. But if you and your buddies decide to play with it, we’re sure you can come up with some good punishment for missing a Super Toe kick.  Ah, and who could forget this Super Toe commercial with Alex Karras…

1916 Army-Navy Game Photo

WHY BUY THIS? Unframed vintage old school football photo that would look great in your Man Cave. Quick history. These two teams first play in 1890 and have been playing annually since 1930. Navy is currently leading the series. In both the 1944 and 1945 games, Army and Navy entered the game as the top two teams respectively.

Custom Team Throw Pillow

WHY BUY THIS? C’mon, impress your friends (or get laughed at) with your last name or nickname on a pillow with your favorite team.  Actually, two of these matching throw pillows would look good on your Man Cave couch. You could put your first name on one of the pillows and your last name on the other. Well, maybe not, since that would require you to make sure there always next to each to other in the correct order.

Football-shaped Chilling Stones

WHY BUY THIS? Do you drink Scotch or Bourbon in your Man Cave? If, so, you need some chilling rocks kept in the freezer part of your compact refrigerator in your Man Cave.  You can get regular squared shaped chilling rocks, but let’s be different, and go with football shaped chilling rocks. Or you can get futbol shaped chilling rocks, which are actually pretty cool too…

Football Trophy

WHY BUY THIS? The final one on our list is the most expensive. But it’s a replica Vince Lombardi Trophy. You know, the one give to the Super Bowl winning team. It would fit perfectly sitting somewhere on the home bar in your Man Cave. It’s 22 inches tall, but you can buy one that is 13 inches tall for far less…but 9 inches is a big deal.

Final Thoughts

You need to build a movie collection for your Man Cave for those rainy days, which should include several football-related movies listed in this article. You can watch these movies alone, with your friends, or even with your family. Watching movies such as these with your kids… okay, maybe not The Waterboy until there, I don’t know, twelve years old…is a great bonding experience. And your kids will get an early start on the art of quoting movies as they proceed through the remainder of their life. We mean, the day your son or daughter says to you, “Dad, the Lama is a big hitter…” could be the proudest moment of your life. So, start building your collection, and enjoy.